A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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