Fine. I'll sleep in my office
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
What a dumb baby whore.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
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