Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
