bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize