Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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