I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
