i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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