I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Pooping to opera.
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