i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
