..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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