found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
