adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
