I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
