Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
