how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
