spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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