have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
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