I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize