Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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