Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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