she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
