No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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