I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
