Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
