He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
