After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
