BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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