I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
