but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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