I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize