I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
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