dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
