he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
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omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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