Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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