I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Lo siento on account of my penis...
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
