They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
