either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
