I just saw a hot homeless man
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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