my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
