Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize