You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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