As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize