my sisters under your porch take her home
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
