Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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