I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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