I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize