if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
