You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
