We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Randomize
