hell yes lets make some ravioli
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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