I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
