at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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